Something I constantly talk about, both in the infertility community at large, as well as in day to day life is grief. Grief has touched my life in so many ways for someone my age. Lost parents, friends, dreams. Grief and the process of managing it is something I am quite passionate about. With that in mind, I’ve created a few different handouts for my support group over the years. The one thing that is always added is a helpful guide titled “Good Advice – Helpful Things to Say to Grieving People”. It comes from an issue of Good Housekeeping in December 2010 and it is the perfect advice.
The best part of this handout is the fact that it can be used in any grief situation. The death of a friend, family member, or pet. The loss and mourning that comes with the change of someone’s hopes and dreams. The single hardest thing that comes with grief is the reaction of those around us. In the depths of our grief, we need empathy, not platitudes. You aren’t able to “fix” the source of someone’s grief. You are however capable of being the shoulder they need in that moment to make it through. This download gives great responses to someone’s grief that show empathy as opposed to fixes.
Please feel free to use this for your support groups, or even just a guide to give out to friends and family members. I’ve had feedback from several people saying they offered these handouts to friends and family members around the holidays to try and stave off the questions that invariably come up.
Do you have any go-to resources like this? I am always looking for more handouts around self-care, empathy, and grief I can share with my support group and peer groups to help us in our grief.